Get a Life - Get a Coach

Life coaches can play an important role in getting your life back on track. Wendy Buckingham tells you why.

David was getting out of his depth. As a manager of a small but rapidly expanding retail business, he was having trouble controlling the growing staff. His record keeping was behind and he was starting to forget appointments. Needless to say, his home life was also suffering.

The good news is David got on top of these challenges. He and the business are now powering ahead and the quality of his family life has also improved.

Judy couldn't understand why she was coming home from her job in tears. As operations manager for a company that organised motivational seminars, she loved the values the organisation stood for and got on well with her colleagues. Coming to Sydney and getting this type of job had been a big goal. Everybody she knew congratulated her. So what had gone wrong?

The good news is that Judy found the root of her confusion and misery. She discovered that the busy, pressure-filled environment that she thought she would love was actually the cause of her frustration and tears. She quit her job and, in a radical career change, is now back in Queensland training as a naturopath.

So what did David and Judy have in common? They were both in their forties and both knew they had reached a point where something had reached a point where something had to change if they were to take charge of their careers and their lives.

Nothing so unusual in that. However, David and Judy took it a step further by deciding to work with a life coach to help them sort out the problems and make it all happen.

Increasingly life coaches are being used by people, often in their thirties, forties and fifties, who have become aware that there is more to a happy and successful life than they have experienced so far - and that it's time to make some changes.

They may want to change or improve their careers, start that business, sort out a relationship, or simply have more balance and fun in their lives. The catalyst could be redundancy or a niggling but long-standing dissatisfaction with the status quo that is no longer tolerable.

Life coaches are also used by the self-employed and small business people to guide them to take their operations to the next level. And many large and small businesses bring in life coaches to help management and staff in times of transition and growth.

So what is life coaching?
To its critics and detractors it is the latest dubious fad from the US - a mix of pseudo-psychology, counseling and consulting. To be converted, it's the missing link between what's preached in books and motivational seminars, achieving customised results for the individual.

Life coaching as a profession has been around since the early 1990's. It takes its identity from sports coaching. Top sports-people have always reached their peak and stayed there with the help of a coach who believed in their potential, helped them identify what was holding them back and held them accountable for what they wanted to achieve. Life coaches work in a similar way on a personal and professional level.

It's best described as an alliance or partnership that helps you close the gap between where you are and where you want to be. The coach's function is to be a sounding board, a skilled questioner, a resource, a mentor and a challenger.

Life coaches claim they help you identify the best choices and give you the tools to shape your future and weave your dreams into the fabric of your life.

The process of coaching includes guiding you to set challenging but realistic goals and developing the strategies and behaviours needed to achieve success.

As a first step, the coach will guide you to take a critical, but not judgmental, view of your life as it is now and identify what is and is not working in both your work and personal. Then, where the need for change is perceived, the coach will work with you on new behaviours and strategies.

Take Dave, the retail manager - he was coached to communicate with and delegate to his staff more effectively. He also developed negotiation strategies with the owner of the business to set personal boundaries around his responsibilities and the hours he would work.

One of the main function of life coaching is to help you identify what is really important in your life to make you fulfilled and happy and make sure all your goals are compatible with these values.

With Judy, she discovered that as much as she valued contributing to people's motivation and well-being, she also valued and in fact needed a peaceful, quiet environment to be her best. No wonder the busy corporate life drove her to tears. Her coach took her back to the basics of what she loved to do and helped her set a new career goal that was not a 'should' or an 'ought' based on other people's expectations, but something that would really satisfy her values.

What life coaching isn't
Its not therapy. Therapy mainly deals with healing the past whereas coaching is about enhancing the present. Coaching uses information from your past to clarify where you are today but does not depend on the resolution of the past to move you forward. If it becomes apparent you need therapy, your coach will refer you to your medical adviser.

It's not consulting. They are closely related and some coaches are consultants in their field of expertise. Consultants assess situations, provide solutions and often implement plans. Coaches lead you to your own solutions by asking questions and then making suggestions, identifying resources and offering choices. Coaching is much more about helping you learn to make good choices than giving advice.

It's not a paid friend. Friends often let their friends get away with a lot of 'stuff' because they don't want to jeopardise the friendship. They also may not have the very specific coaching skills needed to help you set the goals, change behaviours and so on.

How does life coaching work and what does it cost?
A coaching session can either be face-to-face or on the telephone. Many life coaches are now working almost exclusively by the telephone as they find it more cost and time effective and surprisingly focused. The life coach is trained to 'hear' what is not being said during phone coaching in the same way as face-to-face coaches observe changes in facial expression and body language. The sessions usually last between 30 minutes and an hour and are held two, three or four times a month.

The cost of coaching depends on the way the coach operates and on considerations such as the number and length of sessions a month and whether the coaching is personal or corporate. It is also influenced by the coach's level of experience and expertise. Fees generally range between $250 and $800 a month.

How do you find a life coach?
Because life coaching is a comparatively new concept with, as yet, no formal industry regulations in Australia and no entry criteria, you should be aware and even wary in making your choice. The International Coaching Federation (ICF) founded in the US and its associate the International Coaching Federation of Australasia (ICFA) have developed training an certification requirement for their members. Information on coaching can be found at http://www.coachfederation.org/. The site has a referral section listing its members with their specific area of expertise.

The ICFA site also lists the leading coaching schools in Australia, several of which have comprehensive training programs and their own referral sites. Finding the right coach is pretty personal. The coach that might appeal to one person might be an instinctive no-no for you. That aside, there are some specific checks to be made before you engage a coach.

Coach check list:

What training do they have, specifically in coaching?
What type of clients do they mainly coach?
Can they provide you with the names of clients they have coached for you to contact?
What is their session and fee structure?

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